All Press Releases for 12/07/2004

Christopher Kringle Heath Report 2004

News relating to the health and welfare of Christopher Kringle

LANCASTER, Pennsylvania / PR FREE / Dec 07 2004 --
Christopher Kringle Health Report Release

Greetings all.

As everyone is at this time aware, the largest day of North Pole Incorporated’s (NYSE symbol NPI) annual operation is quickly approaching. Here at North Pole Inc, we have enjoyed considerable growth, and thus our shareholders have allowed us to maintain our operations under measures of secrecy which greatly exceed those normally employed by any other corporate or governmental entity.

And yet, sometimes even the greatest veils of secrecy must be swept aside, as certain other issues prove to be more pressing, especially certain key issues that could possible affect the sole mission that we at North Pole Inc have always stated openly – to spread joy to the world regardless of race, religion, nationality, age, or sex. Our President and CEO, Christopher Kringle is, without a doubt, a private man, one who is so dedicated to his work that he personally oversees a majority of our annual production and the whole of our shipping process. This privacy has weighed greatly on our current discussion amongst the Board of Executives here at North Pole Inc, as to when and how to best distribute the following information.

Christopher Kringle first noticed a shift in his health following the 2003 Annual Product Shipment, with symptoms that ranged to the end of “general discomfort”. After consulting the North Pole Inc physician and performing a battery of test, it was determined that Christopher Kringle has a shortage of the enzyme lactase within his short intestine, more commonly known as “lactose intolerance”. This shortage results a range of symptoms including nausea, cramps, bloating, gas, and diarrhea. While Mr. Kringle’s condition is not life threatening, the ingesting of dairy products, primarily milk, triggers these symptoms, and he was quite alarmed when he discovered his condition.

The North Pole Inc Physician, Doctor Benefold Elfwart, has tried all manners of over-the-counter, prescription, and alternative medicine remedies, but testing proved that results were not within the acceptable range. With children all over leaving Mr. Kringle sweets, cookies, and often milk, the impact of this condition could prove disastrous on the this year’s Holiday Operations. And so, it is with health of the President and CEO of North Pole Inc, and friend to all, that we urge people everywhere to seek alternative treats to leave Santa Claus this year.

We at North Pole Inc, seek to do our best to continue our history of exemplary performance, and only wish the best for our clientele. Please note, that Mr. Kringle’s health condition will not have an adverse affect on this year’s operations, and should not cause a disturbance in the price of our publicly traded company shares.

Thank you,

Sidney Elfwitz
Chief Public Relations Officer
North Pole Inc

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